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A lot of my clients are in totally sexless relationships and I always wonder if the fire could get hot again if only they talked about some new sexual experiences and acted on them. I work on my own. I just feel like there are more important things to do in the city then tracking down one male pro.

Sex without fear – ​my experiment with ​the HIV-prevention drug PrEP | Society | The Guardian

As far as sketchy clients go I always read the messages beforehand carefully to weed out the weird sounding people. If the words someone is using give you a bad feeling then skip it. Again bad feeling in your gut then bail. I am a pretty big, strong guy as well and I always feel like I am capable of defending myself. I do consider myself straight and yes I do oral on men. That always makes me feel super uncomfortable.

I do not. I get asked nearly every time though. Fun fact from my experience most gay men are catchers. I would say only 15 or 20 percent of the men ask me to be the bottom. The rest ask me to top them. I decline all of them of course. Good thing there are other ways to please the fellas. Yup I do oral and the women that want it as well. Not many but every now and then certainly. Something I did I think was cringeworthy.

This woman was performing oral on me and her teeth kept scraping me. At the time for some reason flexing my Johnson made the pain less intense so I kept doing it. Well a few minutes into it the motion of flexing my Johnson so much made me squeeze out a very audible fart. I was so embarrassed. Nothing juicy.

I will tell my two worst days though but they are pretty mild. I went to go see this new male client, hour and a half train ride to him, he was then 30 min late picking me up and on the way to his place he tells me that I have to sneak into his house because his family members are asleep. I tell him to get undressed and lay on his back to start the massage which is what we talked about before hand.

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He says no he wants to give me the massage and do all this stuff to me. I was already pissed about the train ride and him being late and him changing plans all of a sudden really got me angry. Though now I was far away from the train station and very far from home… It was a long trip back. The second experience that was crappy was with an old regular of mine.

He was always a really nice, respectful and helpful guy.

He had been there for me a couple times when I needed help and I thought of him as a good friend. One day we made plans for him to pick me up at 10 in the morning and go to breakfast. He shows up at 7 A. At this point I am so sleepy and getting more pissy by the second. I tell him with just a slight edge on my voice to give me some space while I get dressed. Which he does for about a minuet. As soon as I sit on the bed to put my shoes on he walks up to me and thrusts his pelvic region right in my face.

I got up very quickly and shoved him hard enough that he flew back and knocked up my TV. He looked like he was about to cry and I just said you have to go now.


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Not much of a story I know. I do have a sex life outside or work. My sex drive would be a bit dampened if I had been with a female client but still I always made sure to love her like she was the only one. It certainly helped that most are not traditionally attractive and none even close to how pretty she was. And yes sex outside of work is still enjoyable.

If it ever became different then a lifestyle change is an order. A positive, exciting and healthy sexual relationship is absolutely key to maintaining a relationship. Yeah, I have countless rules. Yea there are a couple that I always have a lot of fun with. A few weeks later three boxes of PrEP arrive in the post. Several sexual health clinics in London and cities such as Manchester, Brighton and Birmingham offer PrEP monitoring services and so before I start taking it, I check that it is safe for me to do so.

The nurse assigned to me is Abramo Marchesani, who is gender non-binary and prefers female pronouns and the name Amanda.

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Amanda tells me that between February and February , individuals attended their weekly PrEP clinic times. She chats to me about my own sexual history and how to take PrEP, explaining that there are two options — either a pill every day, which will give protective drug levels continuously, or through event-based dosing, which involves taking PrEP in the run up to exposure to risk. The drug will take up to seven days to get into my system, but if I take a double dose on the first day, I will be protected after just a few days.

I decide to take a pill every day. Like any drug, PrEP can have side effects.

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More seriously, in some cases it can impair the function of the kidneys and lead to a slight reduction in bone density. My blood and urine are tested and I undergo a full STI-screening, involving anal and throat swabs. These will be repeated after one month, then at six months, and then once a year. I am also asked to commit to a full STI check once every three months. It may seem strange that the clinic is allowed to provide the service when the prescription of PrEP has been blocked by the NHS. A few days later, I receive a text telling me that my kidney function is normal. I take my first dose of PrEP.

During the course of the next week, I start telling people what I am doing. With the occasional exception, they express disapproval or, at the very least, unease. At a party, I discuss the subject with a gay man I have known for seven years and feel encouraged when he is supportive. These are impossible to verify but are absolutely terrifying. None of these reactions makes me change my mind about taking PrEP. And, as my experiment goes on, I find myself becoming increasingly political about the subject. PrEP frees passive gay men from this tricky and often risky negotiation and offers them the chance to empower and protect themselves.

Another argument against PrEP is that it encourages gay men to have condom-less sex and therefore increases exposure to other STIs.

But when have we ever opted not to treat one infection just because we cannot treat others? And yes, the NHS cannot afford certain cancer treatments, but it does pay for anti-smoking therapies, gastric bands for overeaters and the contraceptive pill for straight people.

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Most people agree with the principle of preventative medicine, so why should PrEP be the exception? Surely it makes better economic sense to offer them PrEP? But what I am not prepared for is the strength of my own reaction to PrEP — when I start to have condom-less sex. I monitor the number of approaches I receive and the kind of things people say. I am not and there is no major difference at all. The first time I do have condom-less sex while on PrEP is a one-night stand. I tell the man I am negative and on PrEP; he tells me he is negative but not taking it.

He does not seem to care whether we use a condom or not but, telling myself I am protected, I go through with it. Afterwards, I burst into tears. I feel dirty and guilty, as if I have let myself down.